My life with Lord Krishna

I am the culprit and victim too, My self-worship came amid You and me. I abandoned You in Goloka to relish this impaired world, Realising my flaw, I am striving to get moulded into Your puppet again. Failing every time in finding a way to reach You,  makes me feel like a useless morsel of flesh. Please allow me to love You, Krishna,  although I wonder if I am really worthy of witnessing You anew. You know I am not a pretender,  still, my thoughts and actions are going apart. Is it Your Maya who is playing her role at her best? Or is it owing to my defective love for You? Whatever it is, this dejected invisible dot of dust,  plead You to take her beyond all her defects. If not, she will remain forever an unfortunate soul, whose destiny is to remain apart from You.